Solace in the Present of a Shadow
by x.Deni.x
Summary: JasperxBella. Alice is dead explanation in first paragraph , and then Bella catches Edward and Rosalie kissing I know is seems unrealistic, but bear with me . Bella becomes relient on Jasper's gift, but then he eventually stops using it. Summary sucks.


_**Solace in the Present of a Shadow**_

**A/N: IMPORTANT!!!!!**

**SET AFTER THE END OF New Moon... I think. Lol.**

**This will be a Jasper/Bella story. Can you tell I'm not one for canon pairings, really? My other Twilight fic is a Carlisle/Bella, and I have a Carlisle/Leah out. Carlisle pwns you all.**

_**Point of View of Bella ;**_

The death of Alice took a large toll on the Cullen family, including me. It took the Cullen's, mainly Jasper, a month to track down the two Russian Nomad vampire's that ripped Alice apart and set fire to her. It has been four long months since she died.

Esme was a mess for three months straight. She wouldn't leave the house except to hunt. Carlisle even took a month long break from work. Edward, Rosalie and Emmett refused to play baseball, refused to go to school, and just stayed in the house, except when they had to hunt.

Jasper was the worst. He nearly hunted a human, but then he restrained himself. He only just started talking to people again a few weeks ago.

Everyone misses her perky personality, upbeat organisational skills, and loving manner.

She won't be forgotten.

---

My slow truck inched up the three mile Cullen driveway. When I finally reached the house, I pulled my keys out of the ignition and half jogged to the front door. It was getting dark outside.

I knocked twice after hesitation.

Two seconds later Esme opened the door, and her face brightened upon seeing me.

"Bella, darling! Come in, come in!" She smiled at me in a motherly way, before pulling me into a hug.

"Hey Esme," I said casually with a grin, returning the hug.

"How are you?" Esme asked me, as we walked together into the sitting room.

"I'm good," I replied.

We walked into the sitting room and found Carlisle, Jasper and Emmett, engaged in a deep conversation about the baseball game on the TV.

I smiled to myself, and sat down next to Emmett, and Esme took her seat next to Carlisle.

Emmett turned to me, grinned, and said, "Hey Bella!"

"Good evening Bella!" Carlisle said, smiling at me.

"Hello Bella," Jasper said, actually smiling at me. I was sort of amazed.

I grinned at them all, "Hey! Where's Edward and Rosalie?"

They all shrugged their shoulders, and continued on with their conversation.

After a few minutes, I muttered, "Human moment." And I left the sitting room, going upstairs to the toilet.

After I did my business, I decided to check if Edward was in his room.

I walked in without knocking, thinking it would be okay, and was horrified by what I saw.

Edward. Rosalie. Kissing. I muffled a scream with my hand and ran downstairs and out of the house. I saw Emmett, Jasper, Esme and Carlisle all follow me with worried and concerned looks on their faces.

I ignored them and ran as fast as my human legs would take me, but Carlisle caught up.

He stopped me and noticed I was sobbing hysterically. He pulled me into his cold, stone arms, and I cried my heart out into his chest.

He stroked my hair, and then said, "Jasper!"

Instantly I felt calm. I assumed Jasper used his gift.

I felt three other cold bodies around me, and I untangled myself from Carlisle and moved on to the next person, which happened to be Jasper.

I threw my arms around him and stifled a cry.

He stiffened, but after a second put his own arms around me.

After a few minutes I let go.

"What happened, Bella?" Esme said gently.

I put my hand over my mouth to stifle my cries. I felt Jasper send more waves of calmness at me, and I finally talked, "I s-saw Edward and R-Rosalie kissing!"

I felt Emmett shake with rage, and I broke down onto the ground.

Jasper knelt down beside me and wrapped his arms around me. When I leant into his embrace, I felt calm, collected, and less hysteric.

"I need to go home," I managed to say.

Everyone nodded, and then to my upmost surprise, Emmett pulled me into a bone crushing hug. I hugged him back fiercely. We had both lost something today.

"I'll drive her home," Jasper said, "She needs me to calm her."

Carlisle nodded, and extracted my trucks keys from my pocket, handing them to Jasper, who helped me hobble to the car. He carefully put me in the passenger's side, and as quick as lightning he was in the driver's side.

We drove in silence, but I felt him repeatedly sending me waves of calmness. I was whispered a weak thank you, and we pulled into my driveway.

Charlie's cruiser wasn't in the driveway, and then I remembered her was having dinner at the Clearwater's.

Jasper helped me out of the car and into the house, even all the way up the stairs and into my bed.

As he was about to leave, I said faintly, "Please stay, at least until I fall asleep."

Thankfully, Jasper nodded, and he took a seat in the rocking chair next to me and grabbed my tattered old copy of _Wuthering Heights._

He smiled gently at me, and said, "Goodnight Bella."

"G'night Jasper," I whispered, and immediately fell asleep.

When I woke up the next morning, I noticed Jasper was still sitting in the rocking chair.

He smiled at me, and I returned it groggily.

"_If _you want to go to school, you have a half hour to get ready. Otherwise we can skip and go somewhere else," Jasper said to me. I noticed his eyes were a bright gold colour. He must've gone hunting when I was asleep.

"I am _not _going to school. Edward and Rosalie are going to be there most likely, and I'll be like a walking zombie," I replied, sitting up in my bed and rubbing the sleep from my eyes.

"Do you want to go to Port Angeles and go see a movie?" He suggested.

"Yeah, okay. Is Charlie still here?" I asked, getting out of my bed.

"No he left about fifteen minutes ago," Jasper answered, checking his wristwatch, "During the night I went for a hunt and I borrowed Carlisle's car, so we can use that. He had the day off."

I nodded, and grabbed some clothes, "Human moment," I then told Jasper, who nodded. I left for the shower, only having a short one, and got ready.

Twenty minutes later, I popped my head in my room and noticed Jasper wasn't there. Fear constricted me for some weird reason. Skipping down the stairs, and managing not to trip, I walked into the kitchen.

Jasper was there and had a plate of pancakes ready for me, I noticed in relief.

I smiled at him gratefully and dug in, "Wow, these are really good," I exclaimed.

He grinned at me, "Thanks."

I finished them in a matter of minutes.

"Ready to go then?" Jasper asked me, plopping the plate in the sink.

I nodded, smiling, and followed him out of the house, locking it behind me.

"I, um, have to go past my house for a second to grab some money," Jasper told me, a slight bit uncomfortable, "Will that be okay?"

"Yeah that's fine... I'll just wait in the car," I reassured him, though I felt slightly sick at the thought of possibly seeing Edward there.

We both got into the Mercedes, and drove in silence.

Cautiously, I said, "You know you're doing a lot better now, with the whole wanting to rip my throat out and suck me dry thing."

Jasper chuckled, his eyes lighting up gorgeously, "I'm pretty much immune to you now. You've lived in our house, and I'm around you a lot. You become immune after a while. I think I'd even be fine if I saw your blood, unlike I was at your last birthday." He shifted slightly uncomfortably at the mention of that, whether it was because he tried to attack me or because it was one of the reasons Edward left.

"That's great Jasper!" I said, "And don't worry about what happened at my birthday... It was natural instinct to you. I have no sort of grudge or anything against you, I promise."

This made him laugh, and I felt relieved and relaxed. His laughter sounded like music to my ears.

We got to his house in five minutes max.

Jasper left the keys in the ignition and told me to wait in the car.

As soon as Jasper walked into the house, I felt my throat constrict.

I was alone.

My chest rippled, and I couldn't breathe. I felt dizzy, faint, and weak.

I shakily opened the car door and fell out, hitting the driveway hard.

I tried to take a deep breath, but only ended up choking on my own saliva.

This went on for five minutes, until Jasper came back out of the house and saw me on the ground crawled up in foetal position.

"Bella!" He yelled, sprinting to me at vampire speed.

As soon as I heard his voice I calmed. My throat opened up and I was able to breathe. I instantly felt safe.

"Jasper..." I said weakly.

He took me in his arms and hugged me, putting his chin on top of my head, while I cried into his hard chest.

"What's wrong?" He asked me gently.

"W-when you l-left, I just felt so alone, and w-weak, and I couldn't b-breathe," I said calming down as he sent me waves of calmness.

"Oh, Bella..." Jasper said, squeezing me, "Are you okay now?"

I nodded, wiping my nose, and standing up a bit erratically.

"Do you still want to go to the movie?" He asked me gently.

"Of course," I replied, "I feel fine now."

For some reason, this troubled Jasper, and he furrowed his brow. He decided not to say anything now, and helped me to the car.

I was in the presence of Jasper now.

All was well.

Thankfully, I slept in a peaceful slumber that night. Jasper was with me when I fell asleep, and there when I woke up. His eyes were a bright and shining gold colour so I assumed he went hunting during the night due to boredom.

Edward had this weird stalker thing where he liked to watch me sleep. Honestly, it freaked me out a bit.

I still can't believe Edward would do that to me.

It doesn't hurt as much anymore, thinking of Edward. He's made me not love him.

The movies with Jasper was fun, and for the rest of the day we hung around in Port Angeles. When he dropped me off back home, he even walked me up to my room, promising to stay until I fell asleep.

I had just changed into my pyjamas, and sat on my bed, when Jasper abruptly stood up.

"I'll be back in a minute, stay here." That was all he said, and then he left the room.

I had one of those moments again.

My throat constricted, and I fell to the floor.

My vision blurred from my tears, and I choked on air.

I heard Jasper open the door and come back in, but it didn't stop me, though I did see his shadow, and it calmed me a slight bit.

I looked at him despairingly, begging him to use his gift to make me better.

He shook his head slightly.  
"Bella, I can't keep on manipulating your emotions," He said quietly, "You have to make _yourself_ better."

He went and sat back down on the beanbag, leaving me on the floor.

I tried to steady my breathing, and was successful. I took in deep breaths, and wiped my eyes.

After I was calm, Jasper came over to me and bent down.

"See," He started gently, "You _can _do it on your own."

I just nodded, miserable that I had been stupid enough to be controlled by his gift.

"Bella, you have to understand, if I constantly use my gift on you, then you will become like a robot," Jasper said quietly, "You will no longer be the beautiful, independent woman you are. You will need to be constantly by my side, and you won't have a sense of feeling. Your morals will disappear, and you'll have no sense of direction. You wouldn't be _you_."

He looked at me with his gorgeous golden eyes.

Wait, hold up! He called me beautiful!

"Please understand what I'm saying to you Bella," Jasper said desperately.

I nodded, "I'm sorry," I whispered.

"Oh, Bella..." Jasper said, and he took me in his arms, wrapping me in the tightest hug he could give me, the weak human.

I then acted without thinking – quite literally. I tilted my head up and caught Jasper's lips in my own, in a frantic attempt to rid my worries, yet strangely, it seemed to work, and Jasper kissed me back, much to my surprise.

I was so different than a kiss with Edward; Jasper didn't worry about being gentle, nor did he worry about silly limitations.

Jasper knew his strength, and trusted himself.

And oddly enough, I trusted him with my life.

**A/N: Thanks for reading!!**

**Now, SEQUEL OR NO SEQUEL?**


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